Today we have an awesome guest post from Sarah Powell-Barker, Creative Director of Posh Frocks & Wellies.
Sarah is offering you lovely people some excellent advice on how to stick to your guns when it comes to opposition and obstacles in the planning of your festival wedding. I don’t want to ruin the post for you so I will leave it there but this is one article you will definitely want to read.
Over to Sarah……
Just hold that Beastie Boy thought, and remember it every time to you come up against an obstacle or objection to your festival or alternative style wedding. Yes its different, even outlandish, you’re throwing tradition out of the window, you want knitted flowers and hay bales, welly throwing and break dancing but hey, its your day so don’t forget it. Posh Frocks is all for unusual weddings and we will do everything we can to support you and help you achieve the wedding you want.
In bygone times a young women was married off to the best suitor the family could muster, a dowry was paid and the women moved from being property of her father to the property of her husband. Bride and groom had little to do with the whole event apart from making sure they turned up for the occasion and made their vows (and milked their cows).
All that is now a folklore memory, since the emancipation of women we are now property owners, doctors, lawyers, politicians, priestesses, not quite the pope yet but maybe a cardinal soon. But we do have choices and the will to do whatever we choose. So when it comes to marriage, women not only choose who they want to marry and when, they have also taken hold of the reins in organising everything about their wedding day. Sadly, there are still some vestiges of the old ways not willing to be relinquished by parents (usually) who mean well but aren’t really helping.
We have been providing marquees for couples for unusual weddings for quite a few years now, so here’s just a few thoughts on how to go about achieving your alternative wedding.
Name it and claim it
Write a brief mission statement which sums up the feel you want for your wedding. Don’t go into detail, just some key phrases that describe the ethos, the environment, the ambience and the desired outcome. Once you have this important statement you can share it with parents, family, payers and those whose may wish to exert influence over the wedding. If everybody knows your desired outcome in the early days and agrees to its guiding principles, this will a very helpful tool and reference point if things start to meander or be pushed off course later on.
Here’s an example – We want our wedding to be a woodland party which will be an intimate gathering of family and friends with an emphasis on informality. Starting with a ceremony in the forest, under canopies suspended from the trees. An evening campfire and sing-song with musician friends bringing their instruments along. Everybody to have a lovely time and remember their special day in the woods.
Knock out the detail
This is where you make a list of all the services and different suppliers you are going to need. Be creative, why not enlist the help of your friends who no doubt have a variety of talents, they will probably be chuffed to be asked and you will have a more personal feel to your wedding day.
Decide on the style of food before you start looking at suppliers, whether it be pie and peas or picnic baskets, or you will waste lots of time with companies who do all sorts of fancy food that won’t suit your event. If you wish to have a three course silver service dinner, ask yourself does this fit with my mission statement?
Nowhere is it written in the bible that ‘thou must have formal dining at round tables’. For some parents, deviation from this wedding norm is tantamount to social suicide. If met with silent scowls and raised eyebrows, the statement should be swiftly followed by “I’ll get my coat”. It’s time to take them back to the mission statement and be clear about what you want, be it a mish mash of hired in trestles, tree stumps, food on laps, and borrowed furniture, it will inevitably work wonderfully with your scheme.
You will need to decide upon a criteria for inviting your guests so you don’t end up and with everybody and the next door’s dog, unless you are very fond of next doors’ dog. I heard recently of a wedding where the bridesmaids were dogs, I’m not being derogatory, they were actual dogs with tails, and ones that kept cocking a leg during the ceremony.
Get on with your life
Having made your basic plan and made some key decisions, carry on with living your life. The more time you spend planning in minute detail the more you will have to become anxious about.
Remember it’s a big party and you need to enjoy every moment of it, the planning and the partying. If you get locked into to endless detail, there is an increased chance you may start to find the whole thing a tiresome after fifteen months of seating plan arrangements.
If you come back to it a couple of months before the date you will be refreshed and excited once more.
In the run up to the date, you will be making last minute arrangements and phone calls. Some tasks will have to be left to the last week so make sure you delegate as many of these to friends and family as you can, you don’t want to end up exhausted on your wedding day (don’t give too much to the MOTB she needs her beauty sleep too!).
No other day will be like this one again, you are the stars of your own movie, so lap it up, enjoy your friends, the champagne, the music and don’t stop till you drop, you will be living off these happy memories for a long time.
And finally, please look us up on our website, www.poshfrocksandwellies.co.uk , we love working on festival weddings, we have decorative themes which suit the ethos beautifully. We also enjoy working with our festival wedding clients to customize the decoration to their own personal tastes. And don’t forget
YOU GOTTA FIGHT FOR YOUR RIGHT TO PARTY!!
Image Credits: Marie Slater Friend and Oliver Collinge